Francesca's Birth story
As a lot of women are, I was very nervous about birth. I had some specific concerns, some related to trauma and some were more general fears I had built up over the years. I also had some beliefs that I carried with me about the process and what I was allowed to do. What I did know, is what ever happened I wanted to feel positive about it, and I wanted to prepare for birth. I decided early on that I would like to try and plan for a home birth, as we were just coming out of Covid and I thought I would feel more comfortable at home, which is something Gareth was understandably a little nervous about.
My story below highlights where hypnobirthing helped, as there were certainly times of intensity I could not have forseen, and there were times when I doubted my ability to birth at home. For a while after birth, I wondered if this meant I had failed at hypnobirthing, But it didn't last long, and to this day I love recalling Francesca's birth, I watch the video regularly, and it makes me so passionate about helping other women feel the same.
The Love Your Birth Hypnobirthing course
Gareth and I completed the Love your Birth Hypnobirthing course virtually, with my lifelong friend, Amy. Hypnobirthing helped us massively during pregnancy and labour. My friends and colleagues told me they couldn't believe how calm I was, and I honestly felt like I was in a state of calm most of the time whilst pregnant. But, as it always does, fear crept in a lot too, and I found the tools really useful. For me, this was about so much more than birth, it was about the pregnancy and how I felt throughout this time. When it came to planning, it helped me and Gareth write our birthing ideals clearly, question my maternity care, and when it came to Francesca's birth, Gareth was able to communicate with our midwifes for me, for me when I was otherwise engaged! He was also able to keep me calm in moments of fear using the techniques we practiced, and it helped us proceed with a home birth, and adapt to the unexpected with confidence.
How it started...
At 10.10pm, on a Saturday evening in December 2021, labour began. My waters broke as I climbed into bed after some rather vigorous figures of eight on the birthing ball!
Gareth and I had been watching the latest James Bond, curled up on he couch, in front of the Christmas tree. I was 40+4. and just telling myself one of my favourite daily affirmations - ‘every day, is another day closer to meeting our baby’.
After a quick trip to hospital to check that this was indeed my waters going, we were back home, waiting for the next signs of labour. I didn't have to wait long, at 2.30am, more or less as soon as I lay down in bed, my surges began. So, we got what sleep we could and after a few hours and a guided meditation, at 5.30am things started to get more intense.
So I had a bath, and went down stairs to watch some films with the big light off, the tree lights on, and some toast.
And then...
Things slowed down a little a few hours later, so I went back to our bedroom, shut the curtains and put Frozen two on, and after a little time on the birthing ball, my surges started again. They were lasting longer, and with a much shorter gap. So, we were ready for our wonderful midwife, Becky, to arrive by mid afternoon. (2pm ish. I laboured in our bedroom, kneeling next to the bed, moving too and from the bathroom with guidance from Becky throughout the day.
I felt so excited, relaxed and calm, and I was enjoying the intensity of my surges. I actually did my make up at one point to ready myself for the after birth pictures...
Not long now...
As late afternoon arrived, the intensity increased as I reached the rest and be thankful stage, moving into transition, with the help of some much needed Rolo's.
At this point I started to doubt my ability to manage labour at home - the surges were so intense and as I became more frightened of them, and the more I panicked, the worse they felt. At one point, I requested (very politely of course!) that I be taken into Oldham Royal for a c-section, as I simply could not do this any more. What on Earth was I thinking, having my first baby at home?
Gareth, Becky and me worked through the BRAIN process, and they helped me through this, talking about comfort measures and our options and Gareth was able to talk Becky through my ideals.
At 5.30pm, the equally wonderful midwife Gemma arrived and with some brilliant guidance from them both, I decided I was comfortable using gas and air as a comfort measure. With the first successful inhale, my body pushed, it pushed so hard I was propelled off the edge of the bed where I had been sitting... needless to say it took me by surprise, and it was a very powerful moment.
At that point, I became calm, determined, and confident in my body and my mind. This stage began at 6.10pm(ish).
She was here...
As we progressed, I felt increasingly like I needed to go to the loo, so our midwives suggested I moved to the bathroom. The noises my body made within this time were quite literally animalistic, I didn't even know it was me (the gas and air may have had something to do with that!)
And within one hour, Francesca arrived, with me stood over throne (such a classy lady!) at 7.05pm weighing 7.1lbs.
The last few pushes were a very daunting mentally, my fear of tearing came flooding back, but Gareth was able to keep me focussed, my hypnobirthing practice became it's most useful with the most powerful of affirmations, exactly when I needed it, ‘My baby is the right size for my body.’ It helped me release my fear and bring on her arrival.
We were able to lay in our on bed with her, within minutes as Gemma and Becky had covered it with a shower curtain minutes before her arrival. They even filmed the moment she arrived for us, how amazing is that!?
Francesca, the drama queen she is, was born with her hand over her face, so I did need some stiches which we headed into hospital for those an hour or so later, after lots of skin to skin cuddles, a good weighing for Francesca and shower for me...
Hypnobirthing helped me and Gareth navigate the care we received in Hospital too, and release control where we had none, whilst controlling what we could.
Hypnobirthing helped me and Gareth in so many ways, and it's still helping me to this day. I can't wait to help you too...
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